Camila Cabello is pulling back the curtain on her relationship with Shawn Mendes. She recently posted an extremely candid post about Shawn, detailing what she’s learned about love and the challenges that come with a relationship—especially one in the public eye. In an attempt to be “vulnerable on social media,” she wrote a touching tribute about their relationship.

“I’ve learned a lot about love with this guy,” she began. “It’s not just the happy blissful moments you see in pictures and videos- When you’re in a relationship with someone, it feels like they are this mirror reflecting yourself back to you- I constantly have to confront my fears, my anxieties, my insecurities, my patterns of thinking, my beliefs about life and about myself.”

She continued, “It’s not as simple as it looks in pictures sometimes. sometimes, it’s messy and uncomfortable and ugly lol. But there’s nothing like the pull, the FORCE that is love, to be the light in the darkness- to be the gravitational pull that gives you the relentless strength to be braver, wiser, and better than you were yesterday. It’s so instinctive for us to love, even if our minds try to protect us from it sometimes, but our nature as humans is to love. And to be in love means to choose that person over and over again, to go through the messy stuff with.”

Camila and Shawn’s relationship started in a totally normal Hollywood way: Recording a hit song together. After their video for “Señorita” dropped on June 20, fans began freaking out because of their fire chemistry. Then six days later Camila reportedly broke up with her then boyfriend, Matthew Hussey, and well, the rest’s history.

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