If you didn’t know that Bob Dylan is eccentric, then you know nothing about the man.
The 78-year-old singer’s 10-night concert series at New York’s Beacon Theatre ends Friday and sets a record for Dylan’s longest stand in Gotham since his days as a club performer.
It caps a long history of delightful weirdo antics. Take his brief residency as a radio DJ. From 2006 to 2009, long after the “Blowin’ in the Wind” and “The Times They Are a-Changin’ ” singer shed his folk icon status, he made a career left turn and hosted 101 episodes of the satellite radio program “Theme Time Radio Hour.”
On air, the Rock & Roll Hall of Famer came off as an old-school DJ who plays everything from blues singer Lightnin’ Hopkins to hip-hop legends the Beastie Boys, unspooling anecdotes and commentary for every tune. He also offered up a hilarious imitation of the late Joey Ramone singing the Ramones’ 1976 cover of Chris Montez’s “Let’s Dance.”
And in 2016, the 10-time Grammy winner was even awarded — and grudgingly accepted — a lofty Nobel Prize in Literature at age 75 — the first musician to receive the honor.
Here’s a look at five more of the reformed folk rocker’s weirdest moves, with snippets of his own lyrics and song titles to set the mood.
“Your daddy walks in wearing a Napoleon Bonaparte mask”
(From “On the Road Again,” 1965)
Bob Dylan loves masks. So much so that they were a feature of his famous Rolling Thunder Revue tour in 1975. “If someone’s wearing a mask, he’s gonna tell you the truth,” Dylan said at the time. “If he’s not wearing a mask, it’s highly unlikely.”
Maybe that explains his willingness to don a catcher’s mask for a hilarious photo taken by Jerry Schatzberg, who shot the covers of Dylan’s albums “Highway 61 Revisited” and “Blonde on Blonde.” As Schatzberg, whose photos of the singer are collected in the 2018 book “Dylan By Schatzberg,” tells The Post: “Bob was open to everything. His putting on the catcher’s mask wasn’t strange at all. It happened to be around the studio and I just gave it to him.”
“I’m in the wrong town, I should be in Hollywood”
(From the 2000 song “Things Have Changed”)
While on his tour bus, Dylan developed an obsession with Jerry Lewis movies. He decided that he wanted to make a slapstick comedy and connected with Emmy-winning writer, director and producer Larry Charles of “Seinfeld,” “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” “Entourage” and “Mad About You” fame.
Charles and Dylan met, sorted out ideas, wrote what Charles has called a “very elaborate treatment . . . filled with surrealism,” and secured a meeting with HBO. “We told Bob that if he comes to HBO with us, we will sell the project because they won’t have the balls to say no to your face,” Charles recalls on the Pete Holmes podcast “You Made it Weird.”
They met with an HBO executive who stated that he had an unused Woodstock ticket. Dylan, who showed up wearing a floor-length duster from out of the Old West and a black cowboy hat, drawled to the exec, “I didn’t play Woodstock.” As Charles remembers it, Dylan then “proceeds to have his back turned to us for the entire meeting.” Nevertheless, he adds, “they bought the project, we went to the elevator and Bob says, ‘I don’t want to do it anymore. It’s too slapsticky.’ The slapstick phase had officially ended.”
“One more cup of coffee for the road”
(From “One More Cup of Coffee,” 1976)
Bob Dylan supposedly owns a coffee bar with a boxing gym in Santa Monica, California. The odd endeavor produced some real gems in Dylan lore.
Larry Charles talked about meeting Dylan for a coffee in his cubicle in the gym (Dylan, without explanation, drank Charles’ iced coffee). Los Angeles magazine referenced Gina Gershon popping Dylan in the head at the gym (ever the gentleman, Dylan reportedly said, “I need a good woman to kick my ass every now and then,”). And Ray “Boom Boom” Mancini reportedly once trained Dylan there (“Bob has his own private gym. Best gym I’ve ever been in,” he told Boxing.com).
And if you think Bob Dylan would be a hands-off coffee bar owner, you would be wrong, according to Howard Sounes, author of “Down the Highway: The Life of Bob Dylan.” In a 2017 story on the politics and culture site AltaOnline, Sounes references “a little hatch behind the counter so Bob could peer in from the gym and see who was in the cafe and whether it was alright to come in.”
Obviously, The Post would be persona non grata at either facility. An inquiring call to the cafe resulted in being hung up on. A second try went straight to a whirring fax machine. A third attempt: “Don’t call this number again. We’re owned by a corporation.”
“That land that I live in has God on its side”
(From the 1964 song “With God on Our Side”)
Bob Dylan has gone through various religious phases. At one point he was intensely focused on Judaism. For the 25th “Chabad Telethon,” Dylan, his son-in-law Peter Himmelman (who introduced Dylan as Moishe Rubenstein) and actor Harry Dean Stanton performed a Yiddish ballad as a band called Chopped Liver. It was followed by a song sung in Spanish. They also brought down the house with a spirited version of “Hava Nagila” that featured Dylan riffing wildly on harmonica. Every kid’s bar mitzvah should have music this trippy.
“He’s only a pawn in their game”
(From the 1964 song “Only a Pawn in Their Game”)
In what must surely be a total setup, a customer on the History Channel reality show “Pawn Stars” walked into the series hosts’ Las Vegas shop with an old Bob Dylan record. The double album from 1970, “Self Portrait,” was purchased by the pawnbrokers for the outrageously high price of $50.
In an effort to increase its value, the show’s goofy fall-guy, Austin Lee Russell, better known as Chumlee, was dispatched to Caesars Palace where Dylan happened to be performing. Outside of the casino, he asked random people if Dylan was around and then miraculously chased down Dylan as he crossed the street. Exuding uncharacteristically good nature to a potentially accosting stranger, a grinning Dylan signed the record and gave Chumlee a fistbump. Before heading to his tour bus, Dylan wished the autograph-hound good luck.
Chumlee needed it. He got the album signed “To Chumlee” — somehow, Dylan knew how to spell the oddball name — which greatly devalued the record.
“No one wants to buy an album signed to Chumlee,” his boss, Rick, told him. “There’s not many Chumlees in the world.”
But Dylan’s wish for good fortune must have helped: Chumlee was allowed to keep the album since it was deemed unsellable.
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