BLACK DOG: A traitor in the Brexit ranks

Jacob Rees-Mogg’s gang of Brexit Tory MPs are at each others’ throats after the aborted launch of their ‘chuck Chequers’ manifesto, which included the potty call for the UK to have its very own Star Wars weapons-defence systems. Why are they suddenly on the back foot? ‘We think we have a very senior, well-placed mole leaking our deliberations straight to Downing Street,’ says one Brexiteer, adding menacingly: ‘We are coming for them.’

Jacob Rees-Mogg’s gang of Brexit Tory MPs are at each others’ throats

 Justice Secretary David Gauke doesn’t get many slots in the political limelight so he was livid when his big no-fault divorce plan prematurely leaked out. Walking into his kitchen at home, he told his wife Rachel: ‘It’s outrageous. My divorce plans have leaked.’ Mrs Gauke was ever so understanding. ‘I’m always the last to know,’ she replied.

 Even Labour arch-Lefties seem to be tiring of chanting, ‘Ooh, Jeremy Corbyn’. To sprinkle some real stardust on the party’s conference, organisers thought of signing up Bernie Sanders, the Left-wing Democrat with a cult following Stateside. Sadly, Dog hears Bernie was otherwise engaged and will not be wowing the Labour Party faithful in Liverpool.

Will so-fiery Sarah light up Birmingham?  

 Talking of big-name US imports, ex-Republican vice-presidential candidate Sarah Palin will grace the Tory conference in Birmingham if would-be Tory member Arron Banks gets his way. Former Ukip funder Banks has invited her to a fringe meeting he’s hosting. Should be lively. Palin, left, recently stormed out of an interview with Sacha Baron Cohen for the British comic’s spoof TV show.

Tony Blair gave the Royal British Legion the biggest donation in its history when the former PM handed over the millions he made from his memoirs. Was everyone at the charity appropriately grateful? Hardly. ‘My department named our lavatory after him,’ says a former employee. ‘Make of that what you will.’

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Eddie the Ego falls flat 

 Comic Eddie Izzard’s egotism cost him his seat on Labour’s governing NEC, snipe colleagues. Moderate Luke Akehurst, also defeated by Corbyn allies in the vote, said: ‘Eddie would have got elected if he ran on a team with all of us who share [the] same values. Next time hope we have a united team against the Hard Left, not bull****.’

 Heading into No 10 for dinner to discuss Brexit, arch-Brussels baiter Andrew Bridgen was asked whether ‘a few glasses of good wine would persuade you to support the Prime Minister’s Chequers proposal’. The burly Tory backbencher shot back: ‘I wouldn’t support Chequers if they offered me the whole wine cellar.’

At the same dinner, Gavin Barwell, the Prime Minister’s chief of staff, was worried that normally voluble Brexiteer Peter Bone was so quiet. ‘Cat got your tongue, Peter?’ he asked. ‘I’m only here for the dinner,’ replied Bone. ‘Anything you say in these No 10 meetings gets leaked.’ Wise man. 

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