‘I almost feel angry at myself that I’m allowing him to hurt me again’: Alex Scott hits back at her father for disputing her claims about domestic abuse she suffered at his hand
- BBC football pundit describes her father Tony Scott as a ‘controlling violent drunk’ who was ‘stupidly cruel’ in her new memoir
- Said he has left her so traumatised that to this day she is unable to hug her mother Carol or brother Ronnie
- Alex, 37, has been reliving the trauma of her childhood to promote her new memoir ‘How (Not) to Be Strong’
- Tony, 63, who left Alex’s mother Carol McKee when Alex was seven and her brother Ronnie was nine, vehemently denied claims
- Alex has now fired back at her father Tony’s denials about how he abused her as a child
- Following her father’s comments, Alex told the BBC: ‘I almost feel angry at myself that I’m allowing him to hurt me again by those claims’
Alex Scott has fired back at her father Tony for disputing her claims about how he abused her as a child – which she has revealed in her new memoir.
In a recent interview, Tony dismissed her claims that he bullied and abused her during a traumatic childhood, insisting that he was strict – but not violent.
Following her father’s comments, Alex, 37, told the BBC: ‘I almost feel angry at myself that I’m allowing him to hurt me again by those claims.’
The ex-England footballer said she hoped to ‘free her mother’ by writing about her father’s abusive behaviour during her turbulent childhood.
Addressing his denial, Alex said she refuses to let her dad win anymore after witnessing how his rebuttal affected her mother, Carol McKee.
Speaking to Radio 4’s Emma Barnett, she said: ‘That story from him coming out yesterday takes her back to a place…
‘Hearing the pain and the terror again in her voice last night – that’s why I don’t know what I can do. But I’m not going to allow him to win no more.
Hitting back: Alex Scott has fired back at her father Tony for disputing her claims about how he abused her as a child – which she has revealed in her new memoir
‘This book, the reason was to get some peace. And I suppose when you are in peace it gives you a new position of power and that’s maybe why he’s trying to (respond) right now.’
Tony rebuffed claims he was ‘violent’ towards his family during the interview and insisted he ‘didn’t know why Alex was saying these things.’
He said: ‘Perhaps she is judging me by today’s standards, I don’t know. Parents were a lot tougher back then. But I was never violent, that’s just not me. I never beat Alex or anyone else in the family or did anything like that.’
Alex hit back: ‘I actually don’t care what happened to me. If you are saying being beaten with a belt is just being strict – I can take that, I really don’t care about me.’
‘What I do care is about my mum and the fear and terror that she had to live in and the fact I was never able to help her in that, but what I can do is help her now by speaking the truth. And everything I wrote in that book, I stand by it. It is the truth.’
Denial: In a recent interview, Tony dismissed her claims that he bullied and abused her during a traumatic childhood, insisting that he was strict – but not violent
Alex has claimed that Tony’s words ‘lit a new fire in her’ and she wants to fight to do all she can to help women in similar positions and those who have similar feelings to herself or her mother.
In her new memoir, the BBC football pundit described her father as a ‘controlling violent drunk’ who was ‘stupidly cruel’ and that she and her brother would frequently hear him beating their mother – with one incident so violent that she believed that she had died.
On one occasion she recalled how he beat them and made them throw their toys away insisting that life under him has left her so traumatised that to this day she is unable to hug her mother or brother Ronnie.
Alex was comforted by Holly Willoughby after breaking down in tears on ITV’s This Morning as she spoke about life under her father prior to him walking out on her mother and leaving the family home in east London when she was seven.
But speaking exclusively to MailOnline, Tony, 63, vehemently denied the allegations and said he could not understand why Alex is portraying him in this way.
He cried: ‘I have no idea why she’s saying all this stuff. I was raised in a strict but loving Jamaican family and Alex should know what they are like. I taught her discipline, I did a lot to help her.
‘Perhaps she is judging me by today’s standards, I don’t know. Parents were a lot tougher back then. But I was never violent, that’s just not me. I never beat Alex or anyone else in the family or did anything like that.’
Horrifying: Alex recalled an occasion when he beat them and made them throw their toys away. She said life under him has traumatised her so much that to this day she is unable to hug her mum Carol or brother Ronnie (pictured with them in an old photo)
Appearing on This Morning, the former Lioness who played for Arsenal, admitted that discussing her traumatic past in interviews to promote her memoir ‘How (Not) to Be Strong’ was the ‘hardest part.’
She revealed that, despite writing about her distressing formative years in the book, she claimed to not have spoken it out loud – and began crying when Phillip Schofield read a segment promoting his co-host Holly to rush over and give her a big cuddle.
Alex wrote: ‘When my dad was sober he was a charming guy, but the moment drink was involved that would change. Me, my mum and brother have never spoken about it.’
When Schofield asked Alex whether it was ‘difficult to write’, she took a moment to regain her composure while filling up with tears.
She said while bawling: ‘The hardest part is, I didn’t write that chapter to shame my dad. I wanted my mum to be free.’
Mr Scott, who as one of six siblings raised in east London insisted that he only attempted to instil a sense of discipline in Alex, which he maintained has helped her in her career.
He protested: ‘I’m old school Jamaican, that’s all. Alex’s portrayal of me is completely wrong. But it’s just one of those things.’
He revealed that Alex messaged him two weeks ago to tell him that she was about to embark on a round of media interviews to accompany the launch of her new memoir.
He added: ‘When Alex messaged me, she said that stuff was going to come out but wrote that: ‘I will always love you, that’s just how you are, I accept that.’
Alex previously recalled: ‘What my mum would go through, the terror, the helplessness that you can’t do anything, you’re just living in fear’ (pictured in 2013)
‘She said that she wanted to meet me, but I couldn’t because I was out of the country. I’ve seen the media coverage and don’t understand why Alex has said all these things about me.’
Mr Scott insisted that he wanted to ‘prove his case’ that he is not the violent, drunken man he is being portrayed as.
He added: ‘A lot of things went on between me and Alex’s mum, it’s a long story. I’m collating a lot of stuff that will prove my case.’
Alex’s brother Ronnie Scott today insisted that their father was violent towards their mother, Carol McKee.
Speaking at Alex’s family home in east London, Ronnie, 39, said: ‘Alex is telling the truth.’
During an interview last week with Steven Bartlett on The Diary of a CEO podcast Alex said she has not spoken to her father in person for five years after they attend her grandmother’s funeral.
She revealed that her last contact with Mr Scott came two years later when she was competing on Strictly Come Dancing and had made it through to Blackpool week and he asked her for some tickets.
But Mr Scott insisted: ‘I’ve not seen her for several years, but I have had messages from her over that time. It’s not true that there’s been no contact between us since I contacted her about Strictly Come Dancing.
‘As I’ve told you, she messaged me two weeks ago and wanted to see me.’
In another interview, Alex said she and Ronnie were forced to throw their toys away by Mr Scott who then beat them after she left a green space beside a tower block where they lived.
Mr Scott admitted: ‘Yes, I did make them throw their toys away, but I didn’t beat them. I bought those toys with my money. The kids were behaving badly and that was their punishment. What’s wrong with that?’
In her memoir Alex lifts the lid for the first time on her relationship with Kelly Smith, 43 who played alongside her for both England and Arsenal.
During a television interview, she explained why she wrote about it, explaining that ‘parts of the relationship affected her throughout her life’ and she needed to ‘break the cycle.’
Mr Scott said: ‘I knew about Alex’s sexuality all along, well before she was even with Kelly Smith. Everyone in the family knew about it.’
Recollection: During an interview last week with Steven Bartlett on The Diary of a CEO podcast Alex said she has not spoken to her father in person for five years after they attend her grandmother’s funeral (she’s seen with her mother in 2019)
Recalling Alex’s career, he said: ‘I’ve always been proud of her. I’ve even gone to matches to see her play. I don’t even like football but the only team that I’ve ever supported is Arsenal’s Women’s Team.’
Following the adverse publicity he has received since Alex’s interviews and her memoir, Mr Scott said that he was considering meeting her to discuss what she said.
He added: ‘I will speak to her but it’s something that I need to think about. I’ve got a lot of other things on at the moment that are more important. At the end of the day, what’s come out about me is just one of those things but there’s more to tell to this story and one day, I want the full truth to come out.’
For the past 15 years, Mr Scott has been living in the Lake District where he works as a guide for a travel company taking tourists from across the world around the region.
Crying: Alex Scott broke down in tears as she recalled her troubled childhood growing up with an abusive and violent father on Monday’s This Morning
He said: ‘Look at the reviews of me by people I’ve taken on tour. Does that strike you as a violent, horrible man? I live a great, peaceful life. I don’t miss London at all, and it puzzles me to think why Alex is saying all these things about me.’
It comes after Alex broke down in tears as she recalled her troubled childhood growing up with an abusive and violent father during an episode of This Morning.
Alex admitted that discussing her traumatic past in interviews to promote her memoir How (Not) to Be Strong was the ‘hardest part.
Despite writing about her distressing formative years in the book, she claimed to not have spoken it out loud – and began crying when Phillip Schofield read a segment.
Holly rushed over to give her a hug in a bid to comfort her as she broke down.
Sweet moment: Holly Willoughby gave Alex a big hug as she broke down in tears
She had written: ‘When my dad was sober he was a charming guy, but the moment drink was involved that would change. Me, my mum and brother have never spoken about it.’
When the former children’s presenter asked Alex whether it was ‘difficult to write’, she took a moment to regain her composure while filling up with tears.
She said while bawling: ‘The hardest part is, I didn’t write that chapter to shame my dad. I wanted my mum to be free.
Strong: Despite writing about her distressing formative years in the book, she claimed to not have spoken it out loud – and began bawling when Phillip Schofield read a segment
‘I want her to believe she’s a role model and move forward. I write in the book she still thinks she’s a coward. She’s anything but.’
Alex recently confessed that before her parents separated when she was seven years old, both she and her brother would frequently hear their father beating their mother – with one incident so violent that she believed her mother had died.
Such was the level of control that her father inflicted that Alex was banned from showing any kind of affection towards her family members, admitting that to this day the trauma has stopped her from being able to hug her mother Carol or brother Ronnie.
Opening up: She had written: ‘When my dad was sober he was a charming guy, but the moment drink was involved that would change. Me, my mum and brother have never spoken about it’
Speaking to Steven Bartlett on The Diary of a CEO podcast, Alex admitted they would ‘live in fear’ of upsetting their father Tony and having to deal with the consequences.
Recalling the ‘hardest night’ she experienced, Alex remembered the day of her sixth birthday party when Carol had declined to fetch Tony a drink.
Alex confessed: ‘As soon as everybody leaves that night he doesn’t forget… that was the hardest night that one… My mum is trying to survive for her kids and im in a room listening to everything go on and just hoping she’s alive
Candid: She said: ‘The hardest part is, I didn’t write that chapter to shame my dad. I wanted my mum to be free’
‘I heard everything. I heard her trying to run. I just want to hug my mum but I can’t. we weren’t allowed to show love.
‘That’s the control. If we spoke back or didn’t obey orders, didn’t show you were strong – something would happen to me or my brother.’
Speaking about the long-term impact, she continued: ‘To this day I can’t hug my mum. I don’t think I’ve ever hugged my brother because of that environment.’
‘We lived in fear’: Alex recently broke down in tears recalling the moment she thought her violent father had killed her mother while speaking to Steven Bartlett on his podcast
Speaking about her coping mechanisms as a child, Alex added: ‘The football cage was a safe space. I felt fun, I felt free and at home I was locked in, it was an environment where it was very much controlled.
‘I wanted to love my dad so much, I was daddy’s little girl, but he had this dark side and that’s a side we saw a lot of growing up.
‘Drink helped it out come out a lot more, you could see him turn, that’s how he took it out on all of us, more so my mum.
‘From a baby I could feel it, the environment we’re in. If you step out of line you know what’s going to happen and you don’t want that to happen…
‘What my mum would go through, the terror, the helplessness that you can’t do anything, you’re just living in fear.’
Asked if she ever feared being at home, Alex reasoned: ‘I wanted to go home to protect my mum, to put a shield around her, to be strong for her even though she was doing the same for me and my brother.
‘It’s easy not to talk about it, every single day you see your mum walking on eggshells, she’s scared to have a voice, say something, because she knows what she’s going to go through.’
Alex revealed that when her parents separated her father forced her and her brother to choose which parent they wanted to live with on the spot.
She confessed: ‘I feel sad thinking about him, even to this day… then my dad just goes, leaves with everything, furniture, everything.
‘I’m so lucky I had football. I had that out, something to focus on an environment that gave me structure.
‘My mum puts a lot of blame on herself. I felt guilty as I went to therapy and learnt to go away and talk, but it took my mum back to a place that hurt her.’
Alex confessed: ‘I wanted to love my dad so much, I was daddy’s little girl, but he had this dark side and that’s a side we saw a lot of growing up’
After bottling up her feelings for so long Alex used the tools she learned in therapy to help her move forward and heal from her experience and gave her the strength to recount the abuse in her autobiography, How (Not) To Be Strong.
She explained: ‘I’ve hidden it up until now but I’m older, I’m wiser and I don’t want the heaviness of it anymore. I wrote my book hoping it frees my mum and she can move forward from it all.
‘She read it and she loved it. I’ve gone through a lot of stuff that she didn’t know about. I didn’t want her to panic about me. She’s learnt a lot about me, my emotions.
‘She didn’t know that as a child I didn’t sleep because I was listening to see if she would move in the morning.
‘I was shutting off from life, dealing with emotions, not letting anyone in to help me. Doing everything for everyone around me but I needed someone to do something for me.’
Healing: After bottling up her feelings for so long Alex used the tools she learned in therapy to help her move forward and heal from her experience
Alex went on to reveal that she hasn’t spoken to her father in person for five years after they attend her grandmother’s funeral.
She recalled: ‘He had some drink and said he knows he’s not the person he should’ve been and he carries a lot of regrets and he’s going to change.
‘I remember thinking ‘I don’t care.’ I spent my whole life sending cards, gifts, ringing him jut to check in because I had this guilt he’d be lonely, and from that moment I thought ‘I’m done.’
‘I didn’t hear from him… it’s just all talk. I’m over it.’
Throwback: Alex’s last contact with her father came in 2019 when she was competing on Strictly Come Dancing and had made it through to Blackpool week
She revealed that her last contact with her father came two years later when she was competing on Strictly Come Dancing and had made it through to Blackpool week.
Alex was shocked when she received a text from Tony out of the blue asking if he could get her tickets to the show for a couple of his friends.
She recalled: ‘He didn’t care about me or ask how I was. All he cared about was Strictly tickets for his mates.
‘I had the courage to write back ‘that’s wrong’ and I think it must have touched him in a way as I’d never done that.
‘Straight away he text back apologising and I thought ‘this is bulls**t’ and I haven’t spoken to him since.’
Alex explained: ‘On one hand I’ve done this book to free my mum, on the other hand I’m scared it could ruin my dad’s life and I don’t want that’ (pictured in 2019)
Yet she revealed that she planned to speak to him before her autobiography was released, noting ‘I have to and I want to.’
She explained: ‘On one hand I’ve done this book to free my mum, on the other hand I’m scared it could ruin my dad’s life and I don’t want that.
‘I need to pluck up some courage because I need to tell him I’ve written stuff that’s not going to be comfortable for him. I truly hope he’s not that person anymore. people change… he doesn’t know anything about me.’
Plans: Alex revealed that she planned to speak to her father before her autobiography was released, noting ‘I have to and I want to’
Source: Read Full Article
