Andrew Garfield has opened up about the profound grief he felt after his mother died from pancreatic cancer in 2019.
The actor, 38, is nominated for an Oscar for his role in Netflix’s Tick, Tick… Boom! as Jonathan Larson, the composer of Rent, which he started filming after her death.
Addressing the aftermath of losing his mother Lynn to cancer, Andrew told Jackie Long on Channel 4: ‘It is very very difficult, I think with a loss like that the world gets rearranged and I say that knowing I am not unique in that experience.
‘It’s so strange because it feels very unique when it is happening, it feels like “Oh my god I’m the only person that’s ever lost their mother,” because it does feel so lonely and precise.
‘It feels just like a precise agony and for a period of time I didn’t want to, and I wasn’t able to, do anything.’
He added: ‘I was kind of wasted and the world didn’t make sense, and it still doesn’t, because I miss her greatly, and I hope it never makes sense because I always want to miss her.’
Andrew, who previously starred as Spider-Man, revealed that his mother was proud of his glittering career as an actor, but was much more proud of him being kind to the people working the checkouts at a supermarket, adding: ‘she was someone that was about the small kindnesses in life.’
He keeps that memory at the front of his mind, adding: ‘If I’m short-tempered with someone , if I’m having a rough day and someone walks past me and they’re nice to me and I’m gruff, I will feel a little hand on my shoulder.
‘It will be my mother’s hand and I hear her say “Andrew” and I’ll go back and I’ll say “hey sorry that was a bit rude of me.”
‘I hope she never takes a hand off my shoulder in that way.’
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