‘I celebrate my Christmas Day birthday early as I refuse to share with Jesus’

Genetic lottery winnings are in short supply for the man born on Christmas Day, 1999, but ringing in 23 cycles around the sun had to be different.

If anything, being overshadowed by religious figurehead and Andrew Lloyd Webber musical star Jesus Christ, was a bit tiresome.

The candles were still blown out, Father Time still shuffled me one step closer to the grave, but it was all underscored by mulled wine, Paul McCartney and a Lynx Africa gift set.

READ MORE: 'I grief-binged Domino's most patriotic pizza in one sitting in memory of the Queen'

Enough is enough. Taking back control of a birthday date, bumping up the month and hosting a celebration that wasn't to be riddled with turkey, trees or divine intervention, was on the cards.

Unable to venture out and do anything on Christmas Day left a glum feeling of being surrounded by loved ones, eating good food and watching Ratatouille.

That may be quite Christmassy, but it isn’t the birthday charm so many Brits are suited for and living with, the hangover and regret of a big night out on the town with no attachment to religious holidays.

Trading in stockings and Christmas crackers for bottles of wine and a gig, November was the month for celebrating, and celebrating in style.

It is not every birthday that a person can say they have bottled the Premier League, caught a Mercury-nominated band live on stage and nearly shattered their kneecap.

  • Pensioner who scooped £82,000 on lottery 'just had sudden urge to buy a ticket'

But that can be said for this birthday, one to remember and parts to forget in places after a miserable drubbing to Middlesbrough on the last day of the season planted a promising Football Manager save in the ground.

Third place in the Premier League with Aston Villa is still a Herculean task, though, and to celebrate the finest bottle of wine (up to the value of £7.80) was purchased in celebration.

Although the Villa squad would not be joining for the birthday night out, a handful of fellow Yard Act fans would be, and we trundled off to The Telegraph in Newcastle, since that is the only pub with a jukebox selection that includes Three Lions and LCD Soundsystem demos.

Despite the grand selection of music, we made tracks and moved along to the venue before the music queue could deliver an eighth rendition of Baddiel and Skinner's masterclass song.

Speaking of masterclass though, there is no better way to celebrate a birthday (albeit a month early) than with live music.

Heading deep into the heart of a mosh pit, and then promptly back out of it after the new Doc Martens started slicing the back of my ankles and jumping too hard into the air proved fatal on my kneecap, Yard Act proved more than sufficient for a birthday treat.

Dancing about and sloshing drink all over the place while also attempting to crack the bones around my knee made for an incredible time.

The night could not have held a better soundtrack as Yard Act belted out an abundance of quality tracks from their debut album, The Overload.

  • Car park chaos as drivers 'trapped for four hours' shout, swear and call police

But it was to come to an end too soon, with an after party DJ set invite that was snubbed in favour of returning to a hotel room where I would make major pre-season transfer moves for The Villains.

I may have conceded a move to a month that is not my birthday, but next year, it is only fair if the Big Man Upstairs does the same.

Shift Christmas to January, or November, I'm not picky. I would like, however, to celebrate my birthday with another trip to a pub and nondescript location to witness live music, but on my own terms.

Holding that festive date as my own, rather than having to share it with a religious deity, would be a birthday wish come true.

For the latest breaking news and stories from across the globe from the Daily Star, sign up for our newsletter by clicking here.

READ MORE:

  • Chef vows to 'make beans sexy' after admitting he has 'never met a bean I didn't like'
  • Exploding seashells deployed by USA were part of assassination plan against Fidel Castro
  • Footie fan 'set upon' by World Cup security for trying to do keepie uppies at stadiums
  • Elusive Bigfoot rarely sighted as they are 'scared of people,' expert claims
  • Blind mystic Baba Vanga's 2023 predictions including alien attack and nuclear blackmail

Source: Read Full Article

Previous post Royal fans convinced Meghan appeared undercover getting hands dirty in kitchen
Next post Topless England fan ‘Tango’ fires back at trolls after stripping off in Qatar