THERE seems to be a kerfuffle about whether people who’ve been vaccinated should be forced to carry “passports”.
Fans of the scheme say that people who have chosen not to be vaccinated won’t be allowed into pubs, nightclubs, shops or airports.
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On the face of it, this makes sense, so many well-meaning Lefties are wondering why Boris is umming and aahing.
The problem is that Lefties believe the general population is mainly lazy and daft.
They reckon we need a government to look after us when we are poorly or out of work and that a government is the only organisation capable of providing us with transport, electricity, jobs and housing.
So according to our Leftie friends, it’s only right and proper that the Government chooses who goes into a nightclub and who doesn’t.
People to the right of centre don’t agree with any of this.
They don’t trust the government, even when they’re running it.
Righties want to be left alone to start a business and earn some money and then do what they like with it.
They don’t want red tape and planning laws and speed limits. They can make their own decisions, thank you very much.
Plus, they’ve all seen those spy films set in communist Russia, where government henchmen are on every railway platform, demanding to see every passenger’s “papers”, and it frightens them.
They’ve also been to America, where you are required by law to carry your driving licence, your vehicle registration and proof that your car’s insured when you’re out and about.
This, to people like Boris, means you are not a free man. You’re a number. A cog in the machine.
Forcing people to carry vaccination passports, then, is sinister and Orwellian and not British at all.
So why don’t we let business decide for itself?
If an airline says you can only board its planes if you have proof of vaccination, then let them.
The same goes for pubs and theme parks and cinemas and theatres and shops.
And if a vicar or an imam decides to let everyone in whether they’ve been jabbed of not, then that’s up to them as well.
Because what’s the alternative? If we go down the route where the Government tries to run the scheme, two things will happen: It won’t work.
And someone to the right of centre will set up an online business selling fake IDs. Which will make them a fortune.
Careful, Gordon
OBVIOUSLY, the first two contestants on Gordon Ramsay’s new BBC prime-time quiz show were from an ethnic minority.
And obviously, the next two were lesbians.
So far so predictable. But then, whoa, out of nowhere, Gordon asked the lesbians if either of them had ever “eaten a bird”.
You wouldn’t have been able to get away with that sort of thing in my day, mate.
Pint is best in May
A LOT of people have been running around, waving their arms in the air demanding that pubs should be opened before the Easter Weekend.
Landlords are saying that after a year of disruption and hardship, they desperately need to open their doors to cash in on the public holiday.
But the Government is concerned that early April is too soon to let us all off the leash, and that the process needs to be careful and measured.
Both sides have a point, so how’s this for an idea? We move Easter.
Let’s put it back to the middle of May, when the weather will be better and it’ll be safe for us all to go out.
The only person who could possibly mind is Jesus, and he’s dead. Which is kind of what we are talking about here.
Net is enemy of the jab
AN irritating social worker-type person went on the news this week to say that people in deprived and “culturally diverse” parts of London are not taking the vaccine because they have “financial problems”.
What is she on about? They don’t have to pay for it.
She went on to say that to help, people should be allowed to get their vaccination at home. Yeah, right.
And when the doctor turns up with his syringe, perhaps he could bring a free laptop round as well.
And maybe a Sunday lunch with all the trimmings.
The fact is, that whenever people are asked why they’ve chosen not to get vaccinated, they all say the same thing. “I read about the side-effects on social media.”
That’s the problem, right there. They don’t watch the news on TV or listen to it on the radio. They don’t read newspapers.
And rather than get the facts from scientists and doctors, they choose instead to trust the opinion of some gormless Herbert on Facebook.
Tiger escape
WE learned two things from the Tiger Woods crash this week.
One: He may be able to drive a bat but he sure as hell can’t drive a car.
And two: The crumple zones in modern motors work just as well in the real world as they do in the slow-motion lab tests.
Seeing red at Beeb
THE BBC’s early evening weather bulletin on Wednesday showed a menacing, blood red cloud over the whole of Europe. Along with a caption saying, “Extreme Heat”.
Naturally, I was alarmed by this and put down my phone for a moment so I could get a handle on what disaster-movie terrors were coming our way.
It turned out that, over the next few days, we could expect to see clear skies and temperatures of around 12 degrees. Which didn’t sound very “extreme” to me.
I’d call it: “Lovely weather for the time of year.”
But I guess that wouldn’t sit well in the BBC plan to mention climate change in every single show.
They haven’t managed it on Antiques Roadshow yet, but it’s only a matter of time.
- ACCORDING to The Times, the only HS2 protester remaining in the tunnels beneath Euston Station is someone called Bradley, who is in their twenties. Of course it is.
Blame game
A SCIENTIST who was told by his female bosses to “man up” says he was a victim of extreme discrimination.
Bearded Daniel Price has started legal proceedings saying he was bullied and felt excluded.
Well, mate, I have just two words for you this morning.
“Man up.”
I wouldn't moan over my bloated package
THE talented and extremely watchable Rosamund Pike said this week that she has always hated the augmented breasts she was given in a poster used to promote the Johnny English movie.
Really? I only ask because if someone chose to inflate my “chap” in publicity photographs, I wouldn’t mind at all.
Mars puzzle
LET’S just say that the NASA rover probe finds evidence that there really was water on Mars, and that climate change caused it all to disappear.
This would be a huge boost for eco-warriors like Greta Thunberg and Sir Attenborough.
But actually, it would pose an interesting question.
On a planet with no Range Rovers, patio heaters nor gas-guzzling cruise ships, what caused the climate to change in the first place?
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