GOT my jab next week. Scared s***less.
I think I last had an injection in 1964 and I didn’t half howl.
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I’ve always been a bit of a coward when it comes to stuff like this.
I remember my dad taking me to the local surgery in Middlesbrough in 1973 because I wasn’t feeling too good.
The doctor suggested I should have a blood test and got this huge syringe out. I immediately passed out on the floor. Went home unscathed.
Sorry, it’s how I am.
In fact, my response to doctors is the same as how my dog, Jessie, reacts to the vet.
Except I don’t actually wee on the floor in terror. Or, at least, only rarely.
Also, I keep hearing about side-effects from friends who have already had their jab.
Most of them say it was fine. A few say they had a headache.
I don’t like headaches. This worries me. But I’ll still be having my jab. The one thing that DOESN’T worry me, not remotely, is blood clots.
You may have read that a bunch of European countries have suspended use of the AstraZeneca vaccine because some people who had them later developed clots. And some died from them. The number is about 37 out of 17 million.
This proves to me a few things.
First, that politicians just do not understand statistics and risk. Especially French and Slovenian politicians.
Second, that the EU is still riven with a hatred and enormous envy of the UK right now.
Envy at the speed and efficiency with which we have rolled out our vaccination programme, compared to the hopeless mess in which the European Union finds itself. Never was there a better advert for Brexit. The same dimbo, embittered, EU politicians who railed against the UK “hoarding” the vaccine are now suggesting it’s dangerous.
If they were a bit brighter they would understand there is no meaningful risk from the vaccine. Blood clots are common.
According to all the data already compiled, the number of clots discovered among people who have had the jab is LOWER than you would expect on average in the population, without a jab.
This is the only point that matters. There’s no meaningful link between the injection and blood clots.
That’s why — a little late in the day, as ever — those EU countries are now poised to admit they were utterly and totally wrong.
ENDANGERING THE LIVES OF SO MANY
But the damage has been done by their stupidity.
Their fabricated fears about the injection may well put a lot of people off having the vaccine.
That means take-up will be a lot lower than we might have hoped. And that will cost lives — more people will die of Covid.
And it will set back our attempts to return to a degree of normality.
It’s remarkable that in order to save the European Union — which really is now under threat — the politicians of France and Germany would endanger the lives of so many.
But that’s the EU for you. Hopeless, bullying, devious, bureaucratic and long past its sell-by date.
So I’ll be along to the clinic. If you’re in East Kent next Wednesday and hear a piercing scream, you’ll know I’ve been done.
Horrible sharp things, needles. I’ll need a few glasses of Jack Daniel’s to quell the fear.
'Cancer cell to culture'
WHAT would you do if you heard your young kids were listening to Cardi B’s filthy song WAP?
Trouble is, the song was so ubiquitous – and popular with the under-tens! – they could hardly avoid it.
At last someone has complained.
The brilliant black commentator Candace Owens asked despairingly: What sort of country have we become?
And she added directly to the rapper: “You are a cancer cell to culture. Young black girls are having their minds poisoned by what you are trying to package and sell to them as ‘empowerment’.
“I’m one of the few that has the courage to tell you the truth.”
Quite right, Candace.
And what sort of country is it where people want to ban everything from Homer to Dr Seuss – but champion X-rated obscenities from a non-talent such as Cardi B?
Call it a day, Chief
THE women’s vigil for Sarah Everard, who was murdered, turned into a rowdy and violent demonstration.
The police were probably justified in reacting the way they did.
There are believable reports that the whole thing was hijacked by the Trotskyite nutters of the Socialist Workers Party.
But there’s no doubt the coppers behave very differently depending upon who is protesting.
Anti-lockdown demo – batons out and lots of arrests. Black Lives Matter demo – police stand by (or go down on one knee).
I suspect the women’s vigil got their goat because there were lots of airheads with placards reading “defund the police”.
There have been calls for the boss of the Metropolitan Police, Cressida Dick, to resign.
She should have resigned years ago, after running the 2005 police operation that led to the fatal shooting of innocent Brazilian Jean Charles de Menezes on a London Tube train.
Balls to the Wags
LOCKDOWN or no lockdown, the Wagatha Christie feud continues.
Rebekah Vardy has posted a none too subtle quote for the attention of her nemesis, Coleen Rooney.
“They say people in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones . . . but when karma is ready she will throw a bowling ball at your head.”
Righto, got that, thank you.
The problem is, Coleen almost certainly thinks karma is a deliciously creamy Indian curry. And is wondering how it can lift up a bowling ball.
Mother of all messes
I’VE been seething ever since I read about “lazy mum” Kerry Davies in yesterday’s Sun.
She doesn’t seem to exert much discipline over her two sons. They can do more or less what they like. Including gaming for 12 hours at a stretch.
The meals the family eat are reheated convenience food because Kerry can’t be ar*ed to cook properly.
This isn’t parenting. It’s called being an idle, selfish cow.
Kerry admits that she sometimes tells her son, “There’s more to life than gaming”. But he “doesn’t really listen”.
That’s because he is a CHILD. And children are not capable of making the right choices in life.
That’s why we have things called PARENTS.
It may be hard work sometimes. It may be tiring.
But kids need from their mums and dads a bit of structure and discipline.
Bo in a China shop
THE Government is rightly being questioned over its willingness to cosy up to China in return for a few good trade deals.
China is a foul, totalitarian country.
It denies its subjects human rights (such as voting). It imprisons dissidents, and bullies every country around it.
Here’s the thing, Boris. If you sup with the devil, make sure you have a long spoon. And use it to poke him in the eye.
Woe is Harry
I SEE that “Megnarry” have been preserving their privacy as more details emerge of their post-interview dealings with the royals. Once again, they appear to have stuck the boot in – this time through Meghan’s friend, US broadcaster Gayle King.
Apparently Harry had a good long talk with his dad and his brother and didn’t much enjoy it. Oooh, I wish I had the transcript of those exchanges. “You whining, entitled, little ginger nurk . . . ” etc.
The sad thing is, Harry does not understand the degree to which the British public has turned against him and his missus, according to the polls.
All they hear are the murmurs of approval from similarly narcissistic US slebs and deadbeats like Hillary Clinton. One day he will regret all this, I think.
Plants planks
THE national derangement continues. Kew Gardens is to put labels on its plants explaining their involvement, willing or otherwise, in the slave trade. Naughty plants!
Sugar cane, for example.
This is “decolonising” Kew, according to some bloke there who was presumably given the job by mistake.
I do hope that henceforth they will give due prominence to flowers of colour, rather than oppressive white stuff like lilies etc. When is this idiocy going to stop?
Net closing in around Sturgeon
THE net is closing in around that arrogant little munchkin Nicola Sturgeon.
Conservative MP David Davis claims to have evidence that the Scottish National Party leader was not telling the whole truth about her involvement in the prosecution of former leader Alex Salmond. (Yup, they all hate each other up there).
My guess is she won’t be leader past Easter. Meanwhile, her party is set to LOSE seats in the forthcoming election.
Recent polling says there is now a majority in Scotland for staying within the Union.
See? There is some good news around, if you search for it.
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