CONGRATS to supermodel Naomi Campbell, who this week has become a mother at 50.
Exactly how she became a mum has not been confirmed but the suggestion is that she may have used a surrogate and is now the proud parent to a baby girl.
Full disclosure: I’m no fan of Ms Campbell. She has over the years developed a somewhat negative reputation that precedes her – she appears to have been unpleasant and arrogant to those around her.
I came across her at an awards ceremony about 18 years ago and backstage she shouted and complained in a most obnoxious manner, and I have never truly been able to see past that – despite her extraordinary beauty.
Campbell recently commented about having children: “With the way science is, I think I can do it when I want.” And that is something with which I’d very much like to take issue.
I was nearly 41 when I had my last child. I felt that was late, that I was pushing Mother Nature to the edge, and I understood that I and my unborn child both faced greater risks.
But then I was first made a mum at 27. I also acknowledge that motherhood is not every woman’s calling. And I acknowledge that nature weighs heavily in favour of men in this debate.
But does that mean that women in their 60s or 70s should opt for surrogacy, just because they can?
I am thrilled that women are taking control of their reproductive life and deciding to postpone for their own personal reasons – as long as it is not a decision they come to regret when a diminished fertility creeps up on them.
But the arrogance of suggesting you should do something just because it is possible doesn’t sit well with me.
If Ms Campbell has chosen the surrogacy route, which is another wonderful option for singles or couples, then she’s not asking her body to go through the arduous task of pregnancy for nine months, which makes things considerably less risky at 50.
But does that mean that women in their 60s or 70s should opt for surrogacy, just because they can?
No. I always think you need to consider the life you’re creating or co-creating. How long will you as a parent be around for? How will you cope?
Because despite Ms Campbell referring to her newborn daughter as a “gentle soul”, babies are not. They are exhausting.
They are worth it but it’s gruelling, tiring and backbreaking. I know – I’ve done it four times and one of those times I was completely on my own with a congenitally sick child.
I’m fully in favour of women having greater choice. But I cannot pretend that just because you can, you should.
So congratulations, I suppose, Naomi. Her foot looks divine.
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