My dad and older brother depend on me for everything and it’s breaking me

Dear Deidre: MY father and older brother depend on me for everything and it’s breaking me.

I am a man of 23 and spend the entire time running around after both of them.


For more advice from Dear Deidre

No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.

  • Dear Deidre on Mental Health
  • Dear Deidre on Identity  
  • Dear Deidre on Debt and Money 
  • Dear Deidre on Work
  • Dear Deidre on Health and Wellbeing 
  • Dear Deidre on Addiction

My dad is 56 and has a bad back and leg so he has mobility problems. My brother is 26 and has anxiety and depression.

Ever since the age of 12, I have been their carer, taking them to medical and dentist appointments, taking my brother to his counselling appointments, food shopping, clothes shopping and doing most of the housework.

Neither of them lift a finger. My brother won’t even lift his dirty plate from the dinner table.

Get in touch with Deidre

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

Send an email to [email protected]

You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.

If I sit down for a moment they badger me for a cup of tea or snack until I cave in.

I feel like I am missing out on so much. I have no friends because I have to stay at home to look after my family. 

Most read in Dear Deidre

IT'S OVER

I ghosted my best friend because she lied about me and I don't want confrontation

NO FOCUS

I keep thinking about my ex-boyfriend and I am worried I will fail my degree

THANK YOU

I am slowly finding strength to carry on with life after husband's sudden death

ESSEX DIGS

My friend keeps putting me down because I'm from Romford and I'm fed up

DEIDRE SAYS: You are a young man and while it is admirable that you are helping your dad and brother so much, you need your own interests and regular respite.

You have clearly fallen through the cracks of the social care system and with the burden of responsibility on you, it’s no wonder you are depressed. 

I’m sending you my support pack Help For Carers which has plenty of sources of support.

Please also contact Carers UK (carersuk.org, helpline 0808 808 7777).

My dad and older b

NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE I ghosted my best friend because she lied about me and I don’t want the confrontation

READ DEIDRE'S STORIES Eric's lies to his fiancée Freya are finally revealed after his 'work trip'

GET IN TOUCH How the page works and how to contact us

    Source: Read Full Article

    Previous post Ex-squaddies in trenches with Ukraine reveal Russian invasion threat
    Next post Women miss out on thousands as their career peak is hit by menopause