By Michael Lallo
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Daylight saving has ended, the nights are getting cooler and the tug of war between inflation and rate rises continues apace. No wonder many of us have few plans – at least until footy season is over – beyond deepening the bum-grooves in our couches while subsisting on microwave snacks and Netflix. But in Melbourne, there’s always plenty to do on the cheap. The best bit? Every suggestion costs $20 or less per person – and many won’t cost you a cent.
Collingwood Children’s Farm is a haven for kids and adults alike.
FAMILY ACTIVITIES It might be too chilly for a dip but that’s no reason to avoid the beach: just rug up, grab some hot chips and check out St Kilda’s fairy penguins beside the pier at sunset. Or visit one of Melbourne’s famed parks, including the Royal Botanic Gardens, Cranbourne Gardens and Fitzroy Gardens, which features a model Tudor village built in 1948 by an English pensioner. Children get free entry to the Melbourne Museum, Scienceworks, Melbourne Zoo, Werribee Open Range Zoo and the stunning landscaped gardens of Cruden Farm, the former home of Dame Elisabeth Murdoch. You can make a day of it in Docklands: the indoor GlowGolf centre, boasting glow-in-the-dark UV lighting, is priced at $12 per person for each game, while the O’Brien Icehouse – with two separate ice-skating rinks – offers discount entry on Tuesdays, with all tickets under $17. Don’t forget the non-profit Collingwood Children’s Farm ($7 for children and $15 for adults). And if you’re in the city, take the kids to see the three-metre cat sculpted entirely from brightly coloured pompoms – entry is free at the NGV’s Ian Potter Centre in Federation Square. Further down St Kilda Road, the NGV’s main gallery, with its famous water wall, runs a free kids’ program.
Comedians such as Wil Anderson often hone their material in small comedy clubs.Credit:Steven Siewert
LIVE MUSIC AND COMEDY A stadium gig can cost upwards of $300 but there are plenty of cheaper options: classical music enthusiasts, for instance, can enjoy free performances outside the Scot’s Church, on the corner of Russell and Collins Streets, at 1pm on most Tuesdays (you can view their schedule online). Jazz fans should head to The Toff for Now Hear This, which celebrates our city’s vibrant jazz scene (entry is free but bookings are essential to secure a table). Melbourne’s most famous live music venues offer a range of discount tickets for gigs, which you’ll find on the websites for The Tote, The Evelyn, Bar Open and the Night Cat. Feeling bold? Jankara Karaoke lets you sing a song for every two drinks you purchase, while Kono Coin Karaoke – with its disco-lit singing booths – charges a minimum of $2 per tune. Although the Melbourne International Comedy Festival is drawing to a close, there’s still plenty of live stand-up at venues including The Spleen ($10 on Mondays) and Coopers Inn (with many tickets under $20).
Polly Woodside, built in 1885 in Belfast, is now a floating museum.Credit:Jason South
EXHIBITIONS From the birth of film to the rise of streaming, this free exhibition at the Australian Centre for the Moving Image, located in Federation Square, is well worth a look. Also at Fed Square is the excellent Koorie Heritage Trust, a not-for-profit centre promoting Aboriginal culture and heritage. Arts Centre Melbourne’s free Music Vault displays costumes, concert posters and other paraphernalia from some of Australia’s most popular musicians. Further down Swanston St is the free City Gallery, which presents quarterly exhibitions documenting Melbourne’s urban history. The Science Gallery, which operates as part of the acclaimed Global Science Gallery Network, aims to engage curious 15- to 25-year-olds by blending art with science; The Rest Is Up To You celebrates the history of the Melbourne Fringe Festival; and the Immigration Museum (adults $15 and children free) explores Victoria’s fascinating multicultural heritage. Another option is Polly Woodside (adults $15 and children $9.50), a three-masted cargo vessel, built in Belfast in 1885, that sailed 1.5 million miles around the globe in its seafaring days.
The Kokoda Track Memorial Walk is one of Melbourne’s most picturesque nature trails.Credit:Greg Briggs
OUTDOORS Explore the natural beauty and cultural diversity of Melbourne’s north-east region – through the eyes of Australia’s first significant art movement – by walking, cycling or driving the free Heidelberg School Artists Trail. The 57 explanatory signs, spanning busy suburban streets to river valleys and Mountain Ash forests, include reproductions and descriptions of works from Arthur Streeton, Tom Roberts and other artists. The Kokoda Track Memorial Walk, also known as The 1000 Steps, is one of Melbourne’s most popular bushwalks, taking in sweeping views of the Dandenong Ranges National Park. The Yarra Trail takes you from tranquil leafy suburbs to popular destination such as the Collingwood Children’s Farm and the Abbotsford Convent; the Kororoit Creek Trail, between Williamstown and Altona, is a relatively flat and easy stroll with off-leash dog parks at either end; and the Plenty Gorge Walk is a great place for spotting kangaroos, echidnas and swans.
Independent bookstores such as Readings have a calendar of events including book launches and author Q&As.Credit:Mathew Lynn
LIBRARIES AND BOOKSHOPS The State Library’s glorious La Trobe Reading Room, known to most Melburnians as the Domed Reading Room, is one of our city’s most beautiful spaces: octagonal, six stories high, with space for 320 readers at its stately wooden desks. If you haven’t set foot in your local library in years, you might be surprised to find they’re home to more than just books – most have an impressive schedule of free concerts, workshops and author events on their websites. And independent bookstores such as Readings host many book launches, author Q&As and children’s story hours.
The Queen Victoria Market has been serving Melbourne for 145 years.Credit:Eddie Jim
MARKETS Free entry, cheap food and beautiful handcrafted wares: no wonder Melbourne is home to an ever-growing number of day and night markets. Our most famous, of course, is The Queen Victoria, now in its 145th year of operation. The Melbourne Book Market, operating on weekends inside the Queen Vic, has a curated collection of more than 5000 new and pre-loved titles; Arts Centre Melbourne’s Sunday market specialises in handmade treasures from local artisans; and The District Makers Market in Docklands has a colourful selection of art, craft, jewellery and fashion. St Kilda, South Melbourne, Prahran and Camberwell are also home to some of our most popular markets.
Melbourne is home to many TV series including Have You Been Paying Attention?, which films in front of a live studio audience.
MISCELLANEOUS If you’re a fan of TV programs such as Have You Been Paying Attention?, The Project and The Weekly with Charlie Pickering, you can apply for free tickets to be part of their live studio audiences. Keep an eye on TodayTix for last-minute tickets, starting at $20, to musicals, plays and comedies. And check out Fortress Melbourne – from just $10, you can play video games and board games with others, relax at the bar or rent a private party booth.
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