My violent ex locked me in the house and beat me for an hour while threatening to kill me – I only escaped by secretly dialling 999 on mobile that was in my pocket
- Rebecca A’Barrow, from Rugby, was brutally attacked by Paul Welsby at home
- Welsby was convicted of assault and making threats to kill in 2010
- READ MORE: I kept a secret photo diary to expose my abusive husband
A mother who was subject to a brutal hour-long attack by her violent ex-partner managed to send a distress signal with a discreet 999 call from her phone which was in her back pocket.
Rebecca A’Barrow, from Rugby, feared for her life when Paul Welsby trapped her in her home and beat her.
After emergency services managed to find her location and send help, Paul was arrested and eventually pleaded guilty to assault and making threats to kill.
Now, the mother has remarried to her earliest childhood crush and has met with senior politicians including the home secretary to discuss domestic abuse.
Looking back, she has revealed how the cracks began to show in the relationship early on as Paul’s controlling behaviour reared its head.
Rebecca met Paul (pictured) when she was 20 years old and he was 28. They married in 2001 and she fell pregnant on her honeymoon
Rebecca A’Barrow (pictured) was left with injuries after a brutal hour-long attack by her violent ex in 2010 when he locked her in her home in Rugby and beat her until she managed to call for help from her mobile phone which was in her back pocket
She said: ‘Paul was eight years older than me, he was a lorry driver and doorman. He was very charming and romantic, and swept me off my feet.
‘He was totally different to the boys my age and seemed so much more mature and I felt he would protect me.’
After meeting when she was 20, Rebecca tied the knot with Paul in 2001 and fell pregnant on her honeymoon.
‘Paul was controlling,’ she recalled. ‘He didn’t like me having my own life and he made nasty comments to put me down and ruin my confidence. Over time, I felt increasingly dependent on him.’
To the outside world, the couple appeared happy and successful. They had two children, a large, detached home and holidays in the US. But Paul became violent when he was drinking.
Rebecca said: ‘In one argument he slammed me into the cooker and put his hands round my throat in front of both the children. Another time, we were with friends at a dinner party, and he lost his temper and was arguing with me.
Rebecca (pictured after the attack) was taken to hospital with her injuries after Paul’s attack in 2010
Rebecca (pictured with Paul) recalled how her relationship looked picture-perfect from the outside but Paul had a bad temper
The mother said her ex-husband was violent when he had been drinking, and added she tried to leave him several times over the years
‘My friends were backing me up and he started shouting and swearing at me. Our friends were really worried and called the police.
‘I tried to leave Paul several times over the years, but I had lost all my confidence and my self-belief. He said it was my fault he lost his temper, and I was brainwashed by him. I began secretly making plans to leave him.’
One night in 2010 when Paul went for a day out at the races, he had been drinking to such an extent that a friend called Rebecca to warn her he was coming home.
Preparing to avoid Paul’s drunken rage, Rebecca took the children to a friend’s house for a sleepover and left her husband a note to explain where they were.
‘I thought it was the best way of avoiding trouble,’ she explained. ‘But Paul called and said he’d lost his house keys. He sounded very reasonable, so I agreed to nip back home just to let him in.’
But as Rebecca unlocked the door, Paul shoved her inside and trapped her in the kitchen. He had lured her back, having discovered her plans to leave him.
She says: ‘He started punching me and he head-butted me. I knew I had my phone, an old style with punch buttons, in my back pocket. I managed to remove it from my pocket, fumble my fingers along the keys and press three 9’s.
‘I had no idea if the call had gone through.’
Rebecca has now remarried her childhood crush and wants to encourage other survivors of domestic abuse to know there is happiness on the horizon
‘Paul was still hitting me, he was screaming he would kill me and then himself and I was pleading with him to stop, telling him how much I loved him, because I just wanted to get out of there alive.
‘At one point the phone fell and I could hear the operator’s voice. I managed to slide it away under my neck so Paul didn’t hear.’
Rebecca lost and regained consciousness during the attack while police frantically tried to track her whereabouts. They eventually traced her through phone mast triangulation and a team of eight officers stormed the house, fifty minutes after Paul launched his vicious attack. She was taken to hospital with severe bruising and cuts.
Paul Welsby pleaded guilty to making threats to kill and assault and was jailed in April 2010 at Warwick Crown Court for three years. He was also handed a life-long restraining order.
Rebecca struggled to eat after the attack because of her facial injuries and suffered with trauma and flashbacks. But she rebuilt her life, working as a nurse, and speaking out to support survivors of domestic abuse.
She has also met the Home Secretary to discuss how best to help other women.
In 2013, she met up with an old school friend, Ian Barrow, and the pair fell in love and got married in 2017.
She says: ‘I had always fancied Ian at school but never plucked up courage to tell him so it was lovely that we got together, so many years later.
‘Leaving an abuser is the most risky and dangerous time. This is what sparked Paul’s attack because he had discovered I was planning to leave.
‘I would advise someone who is suffering from domestic abuse to seek support from friends, family and their local domestic abuse services. It is so important to formulate a safe plan.
‘I have learned to trust again and to love again and I want other women to know that there is happiness out there. The first step, and the most important, is to walk away from the abuse.’
Victims of domestic violence can access support from sutda.org
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