DEAR DEIDRE: I’M a 31-year-old male virgin. If I have sex with a guy am I still a virgin?

I have been talking to a man I met online and feel a real spark between us.

But I‘m too embarrassed to tell him I am a virgin in case it puts him off.

I have never had a serious relationship with a man or woman and was confused about my sexuality for years, but I know deep down I am gay.

I would like to find someone to settle down with but I worry it will never happen.

I did meet someone a few years back but when I told him I was a virgin he backed off. It scares me that it will never happen.

My team and I are working safely from home but we are here to help you as always.

Send an email to [email protected].

Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.

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DEAR DEIDRE

My best friend's husband wants to have an affair with me

FEAR OF GOD

How do I tell my Catholic parents that my lodger is actually my gay toy boy?

HARD TO TELL

PAYING RESPECTS

DEIDRE SAYS: Don’t get hung up on being a virgin.

Losing your virginity means different things to different people.

For some it is as simple as being sexually intimate with someone else.

Trust your instincts and, if they’re telling you that you’ve lost your virginity, chances are you have.

There’s no right or wrong answer.