“Tristan got a confessional. It’s the last season and it’s clear that we really don’t care anymore.” – Nori
The woman behind Nori’s Black Book — a viral parody Instagram account written entirely in the voice of Kim Kardashian’s sassy 7-year-old daughter — continues to bring her talents to TooFab.
Each week, “Nori” recaps new episodes of “Keeping Up with the Kardashians,” giving us HER take on all the family drama.
(NOTE: The below was not actually written by North West.)
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The farewell season started with Khloe visiting Scott at his home where he was packing for Malibu. Because of the restrictions from COVID the family rented a house in Malibu instead of taking one of their usual vacations. Khloe noticed that Scott had a lot of stuff, but asked where Scott’s girlfriend, Sofia Richie, kept her stuff and did she still stay with Scott. Scott said that Sofia no longer stayed with him. Spending so much time together helped him and Sofia realize they were not on the same page. He realized that he is not the average single guy due to his kids and his close relationship with Kourtney. Khloe encouraged him and said he’ll figure it out after some time.
North West: Let’s just keep it real for a minute. Sofia didn’t like sharing her toys with Scott’s kids, so she got out of there.
Later, the family arrived at the vacation home in Malibu. The home is owned by one of Kim’s friends and she has had family gatherings there before. Once settled in, Kim talked to the family about how quarantine had been the best thing for her because it allowed her to study for the baby bar (a one day version of the bar). Kim had been studying for 10.5 hours a day. Kim was nervous because only about 20% of the people who take the exam pass. The test results are public, so if she failed everyone would know. The family was really proud of her for working so hard.
NW: I couldn’t wait for mommy to be done with this test. I don’t know how much longer I could’ve gone on pretending to be interested in hearing about contracts and torts.
Tristan Thompson, Khloe’s ex and father of her child, showed up at the Malibu home. Khloe said it was great having Tristan around more since the NBA season was on hold. Khloe brought up having a second child to Tristan. She felt that since their daughter, True, is getting older it was time to have another kid. Since Khloe and Tristan were not together romantically they would be pursuing IVF instead of conceiving the natural way. Even though they were not a couple, Tristan felt this was a step forward to putting their family back together. He was very happy.
NW: Tristan got a confessional. It’s the last season and it’s clear that we really don’t care anymore. Be on the lookout for my gardener to have a confessional in episode 8.
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Back at Kim’s house, Kim was studying for her baby bar with attorney Sam Farkas. Kim described studying as an up and down roller coaster. Some days she felt like she knew it all and other times she felt like nothing made sense.
Back in Malibu, Kourtney and Scott sat down to talk about Scott’s relationship with Sofia. Kourtney had heard that he and Sofia were on a break. Scott confirmed that they were on a break and said that it’s because he comes with a lot of baggage. He noted that he has always been clear that his priorities are his children and taking care of Kourtney. He realized that Sofia had been a trooper, but knew that anyone would feel neglected when you’re spending more time with your ex than with your significant other. Scott asked Kourtney if she thought they would grow old, travel the world with the kids, while living down the street from each other or together at some point. Kourtney said the kid’s love it, but they need to be respectful and make sacrifices for their relationships with other people. Kourtney also said that whoever is in a relationship with her and Scott will have to understand it’s a positive thing that she and Scott are so close. Kourtney’s parents were best friends and that’s what Kourtney wants for her and Scott, but at the end of the day she really wanted Scott to prioritize himself and his own happiness.
NW: Auntie Kourt found out from a video Mason posted on TikTok that Sofia and Scott decided to take a break from their relationship. I knew the end was near when Sofia started ordering from the adult menu.
I asked Scott if he wanted me to put out a statement on their behalf, but he declined because he said he could contact Teen Vogue himself.
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Malika visited the Malibu house and Khloe gave her an update on her egg retrieval. Khloe said that her doctor told her that her eggs were too fragile and none of them survived the thawing process after they were frozen. Khloe had to start the egg retrieval process over again, but next time she wouldn’t freeze her eggs but start the fertilization processes immediately after retrieval. Malika was glad that she was not giving up. Khloe really wanted to have another baby so she was definitely going for round two even though the process is hard and stressful.
Kris called Kim to check on her before she was set to take the baby bar. Kim said felt like she was ready, but she was a little nervous about the essay portion of the exam. Kim’s dad always bragged that he passed the bar the first time, so Kim was feeling the pressure from that. She desperately wanted to pass on the first time.
Back at Kim’s house, Kim threw on her SKIMS pajamas and her good luck slippers for her exam. Because of COVID she took the test online from her home thanks to special software. Kim was not allowed to leave the room during the test (or it’s an automatic fail), so in the event that she had to pee she had adult diapers on hand.
NW: Never did I imagine that mommy would be wearing adult diapers before MJ, but here we are.
Later, family members and Kim’s friends gathered at Kris’ house. Kim’s best friend, Allison, decided to throw Kim a dinner party to celebrate Kim taking the baby bar. Kim arrived and said she thought she passed but she still had to wait 2 months for her test results. After studying non-stop, she needed a break. Kris said pass or feel, she was so proud of Kim.
NW: I was proud of mommy too. She’s a real inspiration. I told her no matter what, even if she passed, I would never hire her as my lawyer. I need a lawyer that took the adult bar, not the baby.
At Khloe’s house, Khloe documented giving herself hormone shots for IVF. She was doing 5-6 injections per day. The shots didn’t bug her, but she was done feeling the way she felt on all the hormones. She was on triple the amount of hormones she was on last time. Her egg retrieval surgery was coming up so her doctors wanted to make sure she had triple the amount of eggs the second time around.
In Malibu, Khloe mentioned to Scott that she saw him spending 4th of July with Sofia. Scott said that Sofia came to him and explained all the things that made her feel insecure in their relationship. Scott felt like Sofia liked being the center of attention, but in Scott’s life she felt like she’s the last person to get attention. Sofia wanted to figure things out and spend some time with Scott. Scott said they were taking things slow. Scott agreed that Sofia did deserve his attention and he wanted to make the relationship work since they had been together for 3 years.
NW: It’s crazy to think that Scott and Sofia have been together half of Reign’s life. Him and Sofia practically grew up together.
The morning of Khloe’s second egg retrieval procedure, Khloe was tired, but excited. Tristan drove her to her procedure and while Khloe was in surgery, he would be providing a sample. His sample would immediately be mixed in with her eggs so none of her eggs needed to be frozen. The surgery went well, but during surgery there was a “hiccup” with Khloe’s heart. She got some testing done to make sure everything was okay.
Back in Malibu, Kim asked the family what was going on with Scott and Sofia because she saw pictures of them together. Khloe said that they were trying to work it out and it was a trial to see if Scott can prioritize Sofia more. Kris said that Scott’s kids and Kourtney are probably a lot to handle for Sofia at her age. Kim said that if she was in Sofia’s shoes she would say, “This is absolutely not normal and I can’t take it”. She wouldn’t want to be with someone who was vacationing with their ex. Kris thought that Scott was hanging on to what used to be. Corey randomly said that they were all beautiful people and Tristan is the man. Khloe was confused but just said, “okay”.
NW: I love how Corey is just happy to be here. If Larsa had this attitude she’d still be able to come around.
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Later at the pool, Khloe updated Kim on the status of her eggs. Khloe said she had to wait on the mixing process before she knew how many embryos she had. She also said that her doctor told her that based on her blood work, she would be a high risk for pregnancy. She didn’t want to get into specifics on camera, but her doctor said it’s an 80% chance she could miscarry. Khloe almost miscarried with her daughter early in her pregnancy, but she didn’t know that would be an ongoing thing. Khloe was shocked. She kept running into roadblocks while trying to expand her family. Kim recommended surrogacy because she had such a positive experience. Khloe was grateful for options, but she loved being pregnant. It was scary, stressful, and heartbreaking for her to know she could never be pregnant again.
Back at Khloe’s house, Scott gave Kim and Khloe an update on the status of his relationship with Sofia. He said that after trying to make her a priority, he felt like she just wanted to push Kourtney out. Scott had to explain to her that his kids and Kourtney are the most important thing to him because it’s the only family he has. Sofia did not want to share Scott as a boyfriend with Kourtney. Scott was willing to work with Sofia, but Sofia gave Scott an ultimatum: Choose me or Kourtney. Scott felt like his kids and Kourtney are a packaged deal. It became an impossible relationship to keep carrying on with. Scott made it clear that he would never give up his relationship with Kourtney and their co-parenting. If the right person came along into either his or Kourtney’s lives, his and Kourtney’s relationship would only be a plus to the “outsider”.
NW: You mean…. a 21 year old girl and a man in his late 30s with 3 kids and no job aren’t a good match?
Later, Khloe updated her sisters on her eggs. She ended up having 3 healthy embryos. Kim thought that was amazing. The eggs were going to be tested for any abnormalities and from there she would know if she could move on to a pregnancy. She had one girl and two boys. She would do the girl embryo first because she felt strongly that girls needed sisters. The treatments were tough on her body so she’s hoping everything would work out, so she wouldn’t have to do the IVF process anymore. Even though there was no guarantee yet, she was still contemplating surrogacy. Khloe was excited and grateful about potentially growing her family.
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