‘I grew up feeling invisible’: Maria Shriver speaks out about how she felt ignored while married to Arnold Schwarzenegger and being a Kennedy – and why she went to a CONVENT after her marriage ended
- The journalist, 67, has detailed her feelings during her marriage to the actor
- Maria said she turned to a convent for advice following her split from Arnold, 75
- She said she was given ‘permission’ to be ‘weak’ and learned to value herself
Maria Shriver has detailed her struggles with her ex-husband’s stardom and how the impact of their divorce saw her turning to a Reverend Mother at a convent in hopes of feeling less ‘invisible.’
The Emmy-winning journalist, 67, and Arnold, 75, were the ‘it’ couple for nearly 25 years, but once they legally split in 2021, Maria’s perspective of herself shifted as she learned how to ‘value’ herself.
Following their separation – which was due to the Terminator star’s infidelity that saw him fathering the son of the family’s former housekeeper Mildred Patty Baena – Maria turned to a nun because she was unable to grapple with the collapse of her relationship.
The Hollywood and political power couple may have put on a perfect façade, however, on the inside, Maria felt more alone than ever due to her ex-husband’s elite status.
In an episode of podcast Making Space with Hoda Kotb, the journalist revealed she sought advice at a convent to find peace and give herself ‘permission’ to be vulnerable.
Maria has detailed her struggles with her ex-husband’s stardom and how the impact of their divorce saw her turning to a Reverend Mother at convent in hopes of feeling less ‘invisible’
The Emmy-winning journalist, 67, and Arnold, 75, were the ‘it’ couple for nearly 25 years, but they legally split in 2021 (Maria and Arnold pictured on their wedding day in 1986)
Following their separation, Maria (pictured in 2020) turned to a nun because she was unable to grapple with the collapse of her relationship
The Today special anchor explained that she was searching for ‘guidance’ and wanted to be in ‘silence’ following the divorce.
She added that while she has previously written about her experience she has never ‘shared’ it, before detailing what the Reverend Mother said to her that gave her the strength she needed to find herself.
After revealing she went to a ‘cloistered convent,’ the journalist said she was given ‘permission’ to ‘be weak.’
The journalist said the Reverend Mother told her: ‘I think you came here looking for permission.’
Maria added that she felt like she was in a scene from The Sound Of Music.
While at the convent she was told: ‘You can’t come live here… but you do have permission to go out and become Maria.’
For the first time in her life, Maria felt slightly less invisible and began ‘sobbing.’
‘I had never given myself permission to — to feel, to be vulnerable, to be weak, to be brought to my knees. And the world did it to me. And then I was like, “OK, God, let’s go,”‘ Maria said.
The journalist and actor tied the knot in 1986, nearly nine years after they first met before the two separated in 2011 and finalized their divorced in 2021.
The Hollywood and political power couple (shown in 2003) may have put on a perfect façade, however, on the inside, Maria felt more alone than ever due to her ex-husband’s elite status
The Today special anchor explained that she was searching for ‘guidance’ wanted to be in ‘silence’ following the divorce (the couple pictured in 2003)
Maria and Arnold married in 1986 and did not have a prenup. They have four children together: Katherine, 32, Christina, 30, Patrick, 28, and Christopher, 24
Because of her ex-husband’s fame, Maria explained she often felt like she lived in the shadows.
And, it wasn’t the first time the Emmy-winning journalist felt the frustrations of being around those in the limelight, as the niece of the late President John F. Kennedy said growing up in a family that was the focus of public attention left her feeling insecure.
‘I grew up feeling invisible in an incredibly public, famous family. There were a lot of really big characters in that family,’ Maria said.
She went on to explain she felt like ‘background noise’ as a child and it continued until she learnt her ‘lesson.’
To finally accept that she mattered, the writer said she had to see herself through her own eyes, rather than focusing on how others looked at her.
‘It’s not about other people seeing you, it’s about you seeing yourself. And that took me a really long time, a really long time to learn,’ she said to Hoda.
Maria went on to explain she felt like ‘background noise’ as a child and it continued until she learnt her ‘lesson’
To finally accept that she mattered, the journalist said she had to see herself through her own eyes, rather than focusing on how others looked at her
She explained that when those around her ex-husband or her uncle didn’t acknowledge her she found herself ‘getting angry.’
But then, Maria began to value herself and noted that she now emphasized with those feeling the same way as she once did.
Although the journalist understands and appreciates she has had a life filled with success – including winning an Emmy, publishing a book, and being on TV – she discovered that none of those things made her feel ‘seen.’
She told Hoda: ‘What actually makes people feel seen and worthy is talking to them, sitting with them, calling them, slowing down… sitting on the porch, going, “I don’t have anywhere to go. I’m right here with you.”‘
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