Wedding trasher! Mother, 26, celebrates single life post-divorce by wrecking ‘jinxed’ bridal dress with paint before burning it
- Abby Thomson, from Middlesbrough, threw a dress-ruining party post divorce
- The mum-of-one invited friends and neighbours to throw paint at her gown
- After ruining it forever she burned it in a cathartic ritual until nothing remained
A mum celebrated her new single life by trashing her wedding dress with paint before burning it – claiming she was glad to destroy the ‘bad omen’ rather than giving it to someone else.
Abby Thomson, from Cleveland, Middlesbrough, threw herself a divorce party after receiving confirmation of the end of her marriage in September, nine months after filing in December 2020.
The 26-year-old invited friends, family and neighbours round to celebrate the end of a ‘bad part’ of her life and decided to destroy a symbol of her failed marriage.
The full-time carer held onto the strapless £1,000 gown during the lengthy divorce process but said she was glad to be rid of it when the legal split was confirmed.
Abby Thomson, who had recently divorced from her husband sang and danced to the Little Mix hit ‘Shout Out To My Ex’ while friends hurled buckets of bright blue paint over the ‘jinxed’ gown
The party took delight in burning the £1000 wedding gown until only ashes remained and Abby declared that part of her life was over
The full time carer decided that destroying the dress was a healthy and safe way to rid herself of negative memories
Footage from the party on October 8th shows Abby singing and dancing along to Little Mix hit ‘Shout Out To My Ex’ while friends hurl buckets of bright blue paint over the ‘jinxed’ gown.
The scene then changes from Abby coated in blue paint to her dress tossed in a heap and set alight.
The mum-of-one said she was left covered in paint for days afterwards, with her seven-year-old son Bobby joking that she ‘looked like a smurf’.
Abby, from said: ‘It was my idea, the dress had a lot of bad memories.’
The mum-of-one wanted to be rid of the wedding dress forever as it held bad memories of her previous marriage
Abby had the party’s attendees throw paint over her dress that her sister’s next-door neighbour had from recently decorating
‘I just felt like it was the last part that connected us and I just wanted that out of my life.’
‘I had anger and hurt and needed to get that out in a safe way, so I thought ‘what better way than to destroy the dress?’.
‘I invited neighbours, friends, family – anyone that wanted to throw paint at a wedding dress.’
‘Luckily my sister’s next-door neighbour had recently been decorating and she had about five tubs of leftover paint.’
The mum-of-one said she was left covered in paint for days afterwards, with her seven-year-old son Bobby joking that she ‘looked like a smurf’.
‘When they were throwing the paint at me I felt like all the anger was coming out of my body – all the bad went away with it.’
‘Then I burned it so there was nothing left, no dress in a bin or anything.’
‘It was completely gone from the earth forever and all that was attached to it went away with it.’
‘That part of my life is over and I’ve got this whole new life to experience and explore.’
The mum was with her ex for seven years, since Abby was 17 and the pair had a home together with their son
‘I was covered in paint for days, it wouldn’t come out of my hair either.’
‘My son thought it was so funny he was making jokes about it saying I looked like a smurf, and he even told his friends at school.’
The gown was worth £1,000 but the former bride bagged it for a discounted £500 in a clearance sale.
Despite the decent price tag, she says destroying the dress and the memories attached to it was worth more than any money she could have got from selling it.
Abby Thomson with her ex husband on their wedding day. The marriage fell apart after the couple welcomed a son
Abby said: ‘I was going to just burn the dress but if I had just lit it with a lighter then it would’ve been gone, whereas throwing the paint made it more of a release and more fun as well, more of a celebration.
‘Someone suggested donating it but the charity I contacted said they were overwhelmed and didn’t need it.’
‘I did think about selling it as well but it was jinxed in my eyes – a bad omen that I didn’t want to pass on to anyone else.’
‘I felt so happy watching it burn and like I’d found peace, it was the end of a part of my life.’
Abby was glad she thought of throwing paint on her wedding dress before burning it and revealed it was more of a ‘release’
After marrying her husband in November 2018, Abby ended up filing for divorce two years later when the couple ran into problems
The mum was with her ex for seven years and the pair had a home together with their son.
But after tying the knot in November 2018, Abby ended up filing for divorce two years later as their relationship broke down.
Despite initially feeling like a ‘failure’ because of the split, the carer said she’s taken her power back by destroying her wedding dress, marking a fresh start.
Abby said: ‘At the beginning the relationship was lovely, I was 17 when we met so it was like puppy love.’
Abby described the beginning of the relationship as lovely, and being only 17, she felt like it was young love
The dress, which Abby bought on sale for £500, was burned until it was ‘gone from the earth’. The former bride considered selling it but didn’t want to pass on any negativity it may hold
‘Things started to break down when my son was born quite quickly and eventually I just thought ‘enough is enough’.’
‘I felt relieved but a part of me did feel a little bit sad. I felt like a failure that I’m 26, a single mum, divorced and because I’d tried so hard and so long for the marriage to work, I felt like it was all for nothing.’
‘The dress was in my loft until that point, a part just lingering about, but now that part is completely gone.’
The mum now says she would recommend the same cathartic experience to anyone going through a divorce to help let go of the relationship and past.
Abby said: ‘It was the best feeling ever and it’s a release if you’re feeling like you’ve failed.’
‘It can never be undone, you can never bring the dress back – that part of your life is over.’
WHEN YOU SHOULD BREAK UP WITH YOUR PARTNER
Kale Monk, assistant professor of human development and family science at University of Missouri says on-off relationships are associated with higher rates of abuse, poorer communication and lower levels of commitment.
People in these kinds of relationships should make informed decisions about either staying together once and for all or terminating their relationship.
Here are his top five tips to work out whether it’s the right time to end your relationship –
1. When considering rekindling a relationship that ended or avoiding future breakups, partners should think about the reasons they broke up to determine if there are consistent or persistent issues impacting the relationship.
2. Having explicit conversations about issues that have led to break ups can be helpful, especially if the issues will likely reoccur. If there was ever violence in the relationship, however, or if having a conversation about relationship issues can lead to safety concerns, consider seeking support-services when it is safe to do so.
3. Similar to thinking about the reasons the relationship ended, spend time thinking about the reasons why reconciliation might be an option. Is the reason rooted in commitment and positive feelings, or more about obligations and convenience? The latter reasons are more likely to lead down a path of continual distress.
4. Remember that it is okay to end a toxic relationship. For example, if your relationship is beyond repair, do not feel guilty leaving for your mental or physical well-being.
5. Couples therapy or relationship counselling is not just for partners on the brink of divorce. Even happy dating and married couples can benefit from ‘relationship check-ups’ in order to strengthen the connection between partners and have additional support in approaching relationship transitions.
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