I had to dump my boyfriend because he’s too well-endowed and I was unable to handle his enormous member.
He was an enthusiastic and experimental lover, but I didn’t enjoy the physical side of our relationship. I found him too much in the trouser department.
No amount of lubrication or foreplay made sex enjoyable or comfortable. I had to grit my teeth and brace myself for any incoming action…
He’d like to ring the changes with different positions, but my heart sank any time he fancied anything more complicated than the missionary position.
One night, we were in a seaside hotel. We were supposed to be on a romantic break and he was as horny as heck. He started suggesting really kinky stuff.
He whipped out some expensive adult accessories on which he’d spent a fortune. I took one look and said: “No way.”
He accused me of being unadventurous and wasting his time. I was tired after a heavy week at work and wasn’t feeling the love. I couldn’t be bothered to fake interest.
But he wasn’t prepared to take “No” for an answer and kept trying to persuade me. In the end I lost my rag and screamed: “Get that monster away from me.” He was angry and hurt.
I finally finished with him after he suggested we make a sex tape to spice things up. Now he’s devastated and is begging for a second chance. Short of penis reduction I don’t know what he can do to entice me back.
He’s promising to be gentler and more considerate in future. But we’re just not a good fit – in any sense of the word.
JANE SAYS: You hurt your ex-boyfriend’s feelings during a vulnerable and intimate moment. You insulted a private part of his anatomy by branding it “monstrous”.
He can’t help having a large member. If other girls (or guys) have commented on – or even made fun of his size – in the past, then it’s little wonder he’s so sensitive.
Ultimately, you can’t force or fake an attraction. During the night in question (down at the seaside) you told him that you were tired and not in the mood for sex.
You said “No” and he should have backed off, because “No” always means “No” at any stage of the proceedings. Your relationship didn’t survive for much longer and now you’re happily single and he has to accept and respect that.
Warn him that this is not a game and you will not be persuaded or won round.
Sadly, if he continues to hound you, then you will have to report him for harassment. Is that what he wants?
Speak to trusted friends and relatives for support and help. Don’t feel embarrassed about what has happened because you are entitled to move on without fear or embarrassment.
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