DEAR DEIDRE: I ALWAYS worried about my husband taking work in India. Now a woman over there is making wild claims about him.
I am 36 and my husband is 39. We have been together for ten years and have two kids, aged eight and six.
My husband took an engineering job abroad and we agreed to try it for a year to see if we could cope with the distance.
He’s been out there for three years. To begin with, it worked well. But because of the pandemic we’ve not seen him for nearly a year. It’s been tough, essentially bringing up the children on my own. They miss him, of course.
I got a bad feeling when this woman, who I’d never heard of, started putting snide comments on my Instagram posts. She was pretty, in her late twenties and called herself Rose.
At first I tried to ignore it but then she sent me a private message saying she knew my husband “very well”. Stupidly, I messaged her back telling her to prove it. Quick as a flash, she sent me a photo of the pair of them, stood next to each other, both smiling.
Get in touch in Deidre
Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
Send an email to [email protected]
Or private message us via the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
We change all personal details in our published stories to protect your identity.
I blocked her but she got in touch on Twitter and sent me a message gloating that she was pregnant by my husband. She even attached a photo of a baby scan.
I’m reeling. I never imagined he would do anything like this to me and our children. But how can I talk to him about this over Zoom?
Yet I don’t know when I’ll see him again to talk face to face. I’m a mess and can’t think straight.
Is this my fault for allowing our family to be separated for so long?
For more advice from Dear Deidre
No issue is too small, too large or too embarrassing. Read our personal replies here.
- Dear Deidre on Sex
- Dear Deidre on Relationships
- Dear Deidre on Marriage
- Dear Deidre on Family
- Dear Deidre on Parenting
- Dear Deidre on Grief
DEIDRE SAYS: This stranger seems particularly keen to stake her claim on your husband and I am afraid there is no way of you knowing whether your husband has been unfaithful unless you talk to him.
Delaying this conversation won’t do you any good – and what difference does it make if you talk on Zoom, over the phone or face to face? You need the truth and either way, it sounds like your living arrangements are not working well.
This is the time to address what you both want for your family in the future.
If he is set to become a father again, he will have some ongoing financial responsibility for the child.
I am sending you my support pack on moving on after cheating. If this woman continues to harass you, contact the National Stalking Helpline (stalkinghelpline.org, 0808 802 0300).
NEXT IN TODAY'S DEAR DEIDRE My partner brutally dumped me over text after 20 years together
READ DEIDRE'S PHOTO CASEBOOK Maggie's boyfriend has a go at her for spending too much on clothes
GET IN TOUCH How the page works and how to contact us
Source: Read Full Article
