DEAR DEIDRE: NOT content with using very large sex toys, my wife tells me she now wants to try out the real thing.
I love her and she says she loves me but not my penis. She complains I don’t “hit the spot” when we are having sex.
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I’m sure she feels I’m too small to give her satisfaction, although I think I am average.
I thought our sex life was fine but over the past few months she seems to have lost interest.
Now she has confessed to preferring her sex toy, which is ridiculously large. She says I just don’t measure up.
When we were just friends while at university she was always telling me about her sexual exploits and how she loved “big” guys.
I am 30 and she is 29. We got married two years ago.
Her phone is full pictures of men with huge manhoods and I’ve discovered she has been on some sex sites for well-endowed men.
She has been talking to one of these men a lot and has told him she would like to meet up with him and have casual sex.
She calls him her “big boy”.
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I was so shocked because I didn’t think she would ever do something like this. It’s made me feel very insecure and jealous. She didn’t even seem embarrassed when I confronted her, and simply admitted she wanted to give it a go.
If she goes ahead, I’m worried she will enjoy sex with this man and that could spell the end of our marriage.
I don’t want to lose her.
She says I am worrying about nothing. She insists she only wants this guy occasionally, just for sex.
She says she won’t leave me for him because he has a wife and kids.
None of this sits well but should I simply let her just get this out of her system?
DEIDRE SAYS: No. This is best kept as a fantasy. Involving another man in your relationship could end in disaster.
Don’t put yourself down. She chose to marry you. Marriage is more than just sex – and a good sex life is not dependent on a big penis.
Tell your wife she must come off these websites or your marriage is on the line.
Male size truly isn’t the secret of female orgasm. Only a minority of women can orgasm through intercourse alone.
Great sex isn’t a given just because a man is well endowed. The considerate lover will always win.
My support packs on penis size and How To Thrill A Woman In Bed will help.
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