DEAR DEIDRE: IT’S ten years since my 45-year-old son emptied my bank account to fund his drug habit. We’ve not spoken since.

I am his dad, aged 68. We were very close but he got in with a bad crowd after me and his mum split up. He was in his late twenties then.


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I’ve since discovered he’s been lying to my family for at least 15 years and they no longer keep in contact with him either.

He was dealing class-A drugs, which the family don’t know about. They chose him over me and that’s OK.

But I wonder if I should tell them the truth about what he’s been doing or just try to move on and forget them all.

I am not sleeping and what with the Covid restrictions, I am lonely living by myself. That has made me overthink the whole sad mess.

DEIDRE SAYS: To steal from you, your son must have been desperate. But he also must take responsibility for his addiction.

Being estranged is a gut-wrenching experience but sometimes there are circumstances in which cutting off contact is the only viable option.

It is understandable you want to set the record straight with your family.

Take things slowly and contact the family member who you trusted the most, while being prepared for the reality they might not believe you.

Contact StandAlone, which supports people estranged from their family (standalone.org.uk).

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