DEAR DEIDRE: I DON’T fancy my skinny wife any more and have turned to curvy escorts instead.

Sex with her used to be amazing but everything changed after she had our two sons.

She said she was far too exhausted for any intimacy — but had the energy to get fit and diet.

My wife used to be a size 18 but has slimmed to a 10.

I feel bad admitting that I don’t fancy her any longer.

We’ve been married for 12 years. I’m 41 and my wife is 37. Our children are three and five.

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Six months ago after barely any sex for years, I started using escorts through sites for big women and I started to explore my BDSM fetish.

I bought a couple of whips and a mask for myself when we got married but my wife simply wasn’t into it.

Now I visit the same woman every week. She ties me up and punishes me and I absolutely love it.

Unfortunately, my wife found out after going through my pockets when she had lost her car keys and found this woman’s details.

She is devastated. I’ve tried to explain why I did this, without hurting her feelings.

I love her but the sexual attraction is no longer there. I adore women’s curves and she was a lovely size 18 when we met.

Now she looks slim and healthy but it’s not my vibe. I want more meat on the bones and somebody who can help me indulge my fetish.

Do I have a sex addiction?

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DEIDRE SAYS: No, I doubt it. Your wife is still the same person underneath her healthier, slimmer frame.

But just because she is looking after herself shouldn’t mean that you dismiss her and look for somebody bigger to satisfy your desires.

You are jeopardising your marriage and your sexual health. She deserves better.

We all change as we age, you included, but riding through these changes is part of being in a loving and committed relationship.

If your wife doesn’t match up to your image of somebody with that curvy sex appeal, then it’s time to do some work – on yourself.

Plead with your wife for forgiveness and focus solely on her. Let’s hope she believes you are sorry.

My support pack on Fetishes and one on Cheating should help too.

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