DEAR DEIDRE: NOW we’ve split up I don’t think it is an good idea for our children to keep in touch – but my ex says I’m bad and evil.

At first, I agreed to her seeing my girls. But after thinking about it more, I suggested we cut all contact.

I think it wouldn’t be fair on my children to see her, although she did have a bond with them.

I’m 42 and my ex is 39. We were together for five years.

My ex discovered I’d messaged a previous girlfriend. There was nothing physical but it was a stupid thing to do.

I regret it but after days of arguing and fighting, we talked.

Then, out of the blue, my ex decided to end it.

She has children too and she wants hers to see mine, but I worry they will become more and more attached to each other.

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My girls are 13 and 15 and hers are 12 and 14.

Am I wrong to refuse to do this?

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DEIDRE SAYS: You have thought carefully about what you feel is in the best interests of your children.

But have you asked them what they want?

They cannot make the decision, as this would be stressful for them.
But their wishes need to be taken into account.


Alana is annoyed with her mum Emma for having men around the house

My daughter’s school thinks I’m hurting her, but I’m sure she has ADHD

It is possible they will decide to keep in contact with one another via social media when they reach adulthood.

Contact (0808 800 2222) for further support.

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