I think men are only 'nice' until the age of 25

I think men are only ‘nice’ until the age of 25 and then they become grumpy and anti-social – but people say my opinion is ‘sexist’

  • Woman sparked Mumsnet debate by claiming men are only ‘nice’ until they’re 25 
  • Anonymous British poster wonders how men in their 40s ‘secretly view women’
  • READ MORE: Men NEVER ask questions on dates – are they socially awkward? 

A woman has sparked an online debate after claiming that men are only ‘really nice’ until they are 25-years-old.

The anonymous poster took to the British parenting forum Mumsnet, where she explained that a friend once told her men get grumpier as they age – and now that she’s in her forties, she has noticed this in her male peers.

Her query divided opinions, with some respondents agreeing that men do get grumpier as they age, but others saying they think men improve as they mature.

The post said: ‘Men are only really nice up until about 25. I remember my friend saying this to me when we were in our late twenties, years ago. I’m now mid 40s and kind of see what she meant.

‘Is there something wrong with me in that I don’t seem to be seeing men in the same way anymore? 

A woman has sparked debate online by claiming men are only ‘really nice’ until they are 25-years-old, saying she doesn’t see her male peers in the same way now she’s older (stock image)

‘I used to love men’s company, even though I’m a girls girl/woman’s woman, whatever you call it, I often found men better company in some ways..but now, I can’t help wondering what most of them are probably like deep down.

‘The porn they probably watch or the way they may secretly view women etc. Is this a mid 40’s thing?’

Many respondents revealed that they agree with the poster, with some saying they find men who are over 40-years-old ‘boring’ and ‘grumpy’. 

One person wrote: ‘I think we all get grumpier as we get older. Somehow, grumpy men bother me more so I notice it more and they all seem grumpier the older they get.

‘Even the dog (a boy) seems to get grumpier as he ages. I’ll get a girl next time.’

Another said: ‘Most men are boring . I’m mid 40s and dating and honestly on some dates I’ve been on I’m bored to tears and couldn’t wait to get away. 

‘The older I get the more I enjoy female company with my friends. Much more interesting conversation but it could just be me.’

While someone else wrote: ‘The older men (late fifties) I know are much grumpier and boring than the women, so she might have a point.’

Taking to parenting platform Mumsnet, the British woman explained that now she is in her 40s, she can’t help but wonder how men her age ‘secretly view woman’

Many respondents admitted that they agree with the poster, with some adding that they find men who are over 40-years-old ‘boring’ and ‘grumpy’

Meanwhile, a fourth added: ‘I think men become more grumpy and insular as they age. They sort of withdraw into themselves. Obviously that’s a crude generalisation, but true of a lot of men. They become less social, I think.

‘Actually, a lot depends on education and interests. Ignorant men, who never read, can be unbearable in middle-age. If they were always a bit dull and anti-social, it gets worse. Men like that also cling to their partner.’

However others thought that men in their teens and early 20s are much worse than older men, and that they get better as they mature.

One respondent explained: ‘I love men my age, late thirties and early forties. Having kids, getting married and being open about mental health has really softened them. Men in my twenties… not so much.’

However others thought that men in their teens and early 20’s are worse and that they get better with age

Another agreed, writing: ‘I’d say the opposite; boys are awful from about 12 to about 25 as their hormones rage. If I could do my life again knowing what I know now I’d be celibate until 25 and only then start dating.’  

And a further Mumsnetter added: ‘Omg no! Teen boys are absolutely awful – highly sexually charged, arrogant, entitled. 

‘They tend to chill out a bit through their 20s but perhaps the overt sexuality gives way to something more like chauvinism. The teen boys at my ‘nice’ school were f***ing hideous at times, their mums would NEVER have guessed it.’ 

However some respondents called the original post ‘sexist’ and ‘ageist’ saying men’s personalities don’t change as they get older

However, not everyone agreed, and some respondents went as far as branding the original post ‘sexist’ and ‘ageist’ – with some saying men’s personalities don’t change as they get older. 

One wrote: ‘Weird and sexist. Imagine if a man said that about women !!’

Another added: ‘Very weird and sexist lol tbh all my life from teen I’ve always had more male friends than women lol women are too much hard work !’

And a third chipped in to say: ‘Bizarre, and not to say sexist and ageist post. Individually, my dh has become lovelier over the decades.

‘But, like many other posters, I have loads of lovely men that I know, from 18 to 96. There’s no ‘cut off’ at which point personalities change. How odd.’

Some women jumped to the defence of men, commenting on the post to say they know ‘good’ middle-aged men

Meanwhile several further female respondents jumped to the defence of men, taking to the post to point out that they know ‘good’ middle aged men. 

One wrote: ‘I don’t agree with that at all, I know lots of middle aged men who are really good people, and even have one of my own, who is the best man I have ever met, apart from my dad who is now an excellent old duffer!’

Another added: ‘Spent yesterday afternoon with the men (and women) of my family. Men aged 34, 36, 37, 64 and 74. 

‘The men were all charming, polite, fun and a great time was had by all…. Sorry OP, I disagree with you wholeheartedly.’

And a third agreed, writing: ‘I’d say the opposite. They are better when they’ve grown up a bit more.’ 

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