DEAR DEIDRE: THE carer I recommended to my partner’s grandma has stolen £30,000 from her. I feel so guilty.
My partner, who’s 42, told me her 89-year-old disabled grandma needed someone to help her, shop for her and do things around the house.
A young woman who’s a family friend – and temped for me in my office – needed work so I suggested her for the job and gave a glowing reference.
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Things went well at first. My partner’s gran got on really well with this girl, who is 28. She was a great help, worked hard and was good company.
But we soon discovered the old lady had been giving her money. It started off with small amounts – £20 here, £50 there – but soon grew.
Two months ago, she gifted this carer £30,000 so she could pay off her credit card debts and rent arrears.
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When we found out, we sacked the carer on the spot. She has promised to pay back the money gradually.
I don’t think this was a deliberate con but she was happy to take advantage of an old lady’s generous nature.
I’m 44 and feel awful, as I effectively hired her. Should I report her to the police?
DEIDRE SAYS: Your anger and feeling of betrayal are understandable but is there anything to be gained from making this a police matter?
Morally, the young woman is in the wrong. But if your partner’s grandma gave the money voluntarily and is of sound mind, it might be hard to prove that any crime has been committed.
What is more important is that your partner looks into getting power of attorney, as her grandma may not be able to look after her own finances properly.
Please take advice from your local Citizens Advice office (citizensadvice.org.uk).
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