My mate came onto me after a few drinks and now he wants more

DEAR DEIDRE: MY mate came on to me after a few drinks and now he won’t leave me alone.

I’m a guy of 27 and he’s 28. He’s engaged to be married to a lovely girl.

We were out in the pub one night to watch England play on the big screen and then we went back to mine.

Heaven knows what I was thinking about but I suggested we watched some porn together. We had a laugh, taking the mickey out of the scenarios and then my mate went to the bathroom.

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When he came out, he asked me to touch him sexually. Because I’d had a few, I started to, but then I thought, ‘What am I doing? I’m completely straight’. I stopped and apologised and he went home.

Now I’m getting Snapchats from my mate saying, “Want to play?” I’m really uncomfortable.

DEIDRE SAYS: It’s understandable. It’s changed how you feel about your friendship but it needn’t alter things between you, as long as you’re both clear where you stand.

Find a moment to talk to him to say that what happened was a mistake on your part. Explain you’re not interested in anything more than being mates.

If you can, also talk about your concerns around his future marriage.

Check if this is something he wants and suggest he talks to Switchboard LGBTQ+ (switchboard.lgbt/, 0300 330 0360) who will understand what he’s going through. Otherwise he could be making a mistake he’ll regret forever.

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