We divorced to form foursome with another couple – but it didnt end well

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    Two married couples decided to divorce to form a polyamorous union together, but it didn't last long.

    Rachel Wright and Kyle were together for 11 years when they met Yair Lenchner and Ashley Giddens in 2019.

    The couples, who found monogamy a strain, opened up their marriages and got respective divorces to make one union.

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    In November 2021, the foursome moved in under one roof, where they created a rotation for sleeping partners, date nights and general responsibilities.

    However, at the beginning of this year, Kyle left the relationship, which was a group decision.

    Growing up, Rachel, 34, found dating a challenge and had mixed feelings on relationships as she also had a desire to explore other people, romantically and sexually.

    She assumed there was something “wrong” with her, but put her doubts to the back of her mind – especially when sparks started to fly with Kyle.

    While on their first date, the pair discussed non-monogamy, but decided to stay monogamous until they were ready to open up their relationship and they tied the knot in October 2016.

    Their desire to open up the marriage became overwhelming and they met Yair and Ashley, both aged 36 – before they committed to the union.

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    “Our lawyer was the one who brought this idea up actually – and it was great,” the licensed marriage therapist said.

    “Kyle and I, who were together for about 11 years, had been practising non-monogamy for a little over a year-and-a-half when we met Yair and Ashley.

    “I had no intention of merging lives and families, or creating a life together, but that’s what was naturally there between us.

    “Myself and Kyle had discussed our hesitation around [being with one person], so we checked back in repeatedly until it was time to pull the trigger and try it out.”

    Rachel learned about polyamory while at university, where she discovered that the orientation “resonated” with her on a deep level.

    She said: “I remember thinking: ‘is that me?’ and it made me realise how I’d been viewing my relationships.

    “Kyle and I started reading more books about it, listening to podcasts and using the dating app, Feeld.

    “We communicated so much and I cannot begin to express the amount of additional communication and self-reflection, as well as awareness, that’s required for this to work in a healthy way.”

    In March 2020, the two respective couples started exchanging messages – with Rachel claiming the connection was “palpable.”

    The 34-year-old, from New York, US, said: “We couldn't stop talking, texting and spending time together.”

    “It was a really unique experience that laid a foundation for what we have now.

    “None of us were looking for life partners, but that’s what we had found.

    “After we all fell in love, the label of ‘polyamorus’ stuck.”

    Ashley and Yair, who had been in an open relationship since meeting, began seeing the couple for dates, such at their homes or in restaurants.

    While they shared sexual and emotional intimacy all together, Yair and Kyle didn’t get romantically involved – but still spent quality time with one another.

    However, since Kyle's departure Rachel, Yair and Ashley, have formed a throuple, and are dealing with the emotions, while still being excited about the future ahead – including getting married and having kids.

    She added: “There is a city where the three of us can get in a domestic partnership, so we’d love to do that.

    “If we can, Ashley and I both want to carry one baby, with Yair biologically fathering the kids.

    “I’m still working through the emotions of Kyle leaving.

    “While it’s the right decision for all of us, it’s incredibly hard – I love him a lot.

    “He is a very special person and I will always love him – we were best friends and partners."

    And she's learned to grow a "thicker skin" after receiving cruel comments from trolls about her relationship.

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